Kids : The Stereotypes

HEY ALL

I have been around, met A LOT of people, families and been in many family events and where ever you go, you find kids. All types of them , the short, the tall, the fat, the thin ........ ALL OF EM . So I wanted to discuss their types

1. CUTE KIDS A.K.A "AWWWW" KIDS

Kid: "Mama mama, I jusht got a boo boo"

Everyone in room "Awwwwwwww"

When your house is roaring with the sounds like "awwwww" or "shooooo shweeet" that clearly means you got a cute kid in the house. No matter what they say may it be stupid, funny, beautiful, right or wrong, people would just want to pull his/her cheeks and talk all childish with him/her. They are very lovely

2. ANGEL KIDS

I haven't met a lot of these type in my life but I know 5 of them and this part is dedicated to my 5 beautiful angels.... My 4 Bhateejis and 1 Bhanji

1. Hania & Nooriya :)

2. Shehzeen & Mehreen :)

3. Warda :)

Never has a time gone when they are with me and called me (Hania, Shehzeen & Warda Only, Mehreen & Nooriya cant speak yet) "Chacha, Chachoo or Mamu" my entire tension hasn't just swept out of my body. Playing with them, teasing them, becoming a kid again with them is just amazing. I LOVE THEM ALL VERY VERY MUCH AND THEY ARE MY LIFE :)

I live with Warda and she is soooo close to me, watches cartoons with me, plays and jumps with me

Whenever I meet Shehzeen , she comes screaming at me and tells me A LOT of stuff that I just love to hear. Mehreen is soooooo cute. When she is with me, she doesn't even go to her mother or father and laughs a lot when I play with her

Hania was the first kid in our family and maybe the most dearest to all and certainly I LOVE HER A LOT she calls me "Chachoo" and its soooo cute. I met nooriya after a long time after her birth on her first visit to Pakistan, but instantly got sooooo attached to her that when the time came for her to go back to Saudi Arabia I had tears in my eyes all the way back to Islamabad after parting from her.

I LOVE ALL OF THEM :)

3: ANNOYING KIDS

A picture opens on your computer

Kid: "Whose that?"

U: "Thats my friend"

Kid: "Which friend?"

U: "Friend from University"

Kid: "What is his name?"

U: "___________"

Kid: "Why did his parents named him that?"

U: "How would I know?"

Kid: "Aren't you his friend?"

U: "Yes I am"

Kid: "Then shouldn't you know?"

U: "AHHHH, K I will ask him and tell you... OKAY?? "

Kid: "Why would you tell me?"

U: "Because u asked"

Kid: "That is personal stuff, mom says you don't tell personal stuff about people to others"

U: "ALRIGHT, I WONT TELL"

Kid: "But I wanna know"

U: "SHUT UP"

*you change the picture*

Kid: "Whose that?"

*and the conversation repeats* :P

Enough for the nice kids, now lets get down to some REAL business. These kids are a pain and believe me they are one of the most severe pain you can imagine. Questions after questions after questions and when you get angry at them and scold them or hit them the elders come to you saying "He/she is just a kid but you are an adult and you should know better" ....... SHEESH

4: Violent Kids

Mom: "Hey son/daughter check out these beautiful fishies"

Kid thinking "What if I set this aquarium on fire and then leave ten cats inside and see what happens"

Dr. Octopus, Carnage, Magneto, Two Face and all the well known super villains fail in front of this level of EVIL. These kids are just pure EVIL. They can do the most horrifying things to the cutest of dolls. Beating up smaller kids, doing bad stuff to small animals and pets is just where they start. Pulling hair, stabbing with nails just don't get me started. OUCH THEY HURT

5: ANGEL (IN DISGUISE) KIDS:

Mom : "My son/daughter is sooooo nice, yesterday he/she _______________"

These are the misunderstood kids, people THINK they are nice but they are not and at the end of the day whenever they play a prank or do a mischief nobody believes that they did it and the innocent kids fall in the trap (being explained later) . They would help and old lady cross the road but would trip/push them at the end , they would bring water for a thirsty but would act to trip and spill it over them. SMART KIDS

6: INNOCENT KIDS :

Kid : "Why isn't Chicken's wife called "Chikni" ?? " :P

Whenever this kid speaks he makes a foolish statement and people laugh at him all around thinking how funny his childish statement was. They are subsets as well of Angel kids , Cute kids and Annoying kids. Because they can be innocent and the angelic , cute or annoying. I know some innocent kids who are angelic although they might not know who I am :P . These poor souls have some very interesting questions that people only reply with a laugh

7: DUMB KIDS:

DUHHHHHHHH ............................................. NUFF SAID :P

8: BREAKING KIDS:

*Smash*

*Wham*

*Bam*

*Splash*

The House : "HE/SHE IS COMING , HIDE THIS, HIDE THAT, PUT THAT ON THE TOP SHELF....... HE/SHE IS COMINGGGGGGGGGGG"

THE BREAKING KIDS .......... THEIR MOST FAMOUS DIALOGUE "OOPS"

Rings around the hosue A lot and when this kid is a guest , the whole house is on red alert until he leaves may it be the home team or the away team :P

Toys, ceramics, plates, glass, electronic items, decoration pieces , furniture YOU NAME THEM ND............ YES THEY CAN

WELL THATX IT FROM MY SIDE

ENDING WITH PICTURES OF MY 5 ANGELS

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UNTIL NEXT TIME

X Y'ALL :)

____________________________________________________________________

NOORIYA WEARING HIJAAB :)

NOORIYA ON EID, I JUST LOVE THIS PIC OF HERS :)

SHEHZU (ELDER) & MEHRU (SMALLER) CUTEEEEEEES

WARDA MAKING ROTI :)

MY MOST FAVORITE PIC OF HANIA, SHE IS A LOT BIGGER NOW :)

Letter To Abidal : GET WELL SOON

To,

Eric Abidal

Today morning I turned on my Twitter to read the latest news on Barcelona through an account called Barcastuff. All I saw was different football players wishing you to get well soon. I got scared I quickly searched the news column and read about your tumor. The news came as a shocker because I couldn't believe what had happened within a night.

I Wouldn't go in this blog saying "WHY YOU? WHY YOU TO GET THIS DISEASE?" because you know that "ALLAH" tests those whom he loves. It is very sad that you have to leave and in WHAT A SEASON you were having.

• You had already proved that you are one of the BEST Left backs EVER to step in the football ground but in this season in the absence of Puyol you silenced all your critics who said "Abidal cannot fill Puyol's place" by showing that you are also one of the BEST center backs EVER.
• You scored your first goal and took Barca ahead
• You stood like a wall single handedly in front of a great team like Arsenal without Pique & Puyol by your side
• You provided one of the best through balls I have ever seen in my entire life
• Pique made mistakes but you didn't this season

All in all you made Barcelona proud and you made us Culeans ALL OVER THE WORLD proud. Pakistan is a place where football kits are VERY rare to find and especially Barcelona kits and that too of anyone except Messi. But this season I saw your shirt as well lying around in stores but because of having no money I couldn't buy it.

I know while writing this letter that it is almost next to impossible that you will read it BUT if my luck shines because I will leave no method I know off to get you a hint of this letter. IF my luck shines and you do get to read this letter. I just want one thing, NO NO NO, I don't want an autographed t shirt or you to contact me.

ALL I want you to know that CULEANS all over the world are with you. When you will go into that operating room this friday we will ALL be out there in the waiting area , waiting for the good news because we know that a strong man like you will easily pass the obstacles and then ALL of us will be outside your house waiting for your recovery and then ALL of us will be at the Camp Nou waiting for your glorious comeback.

Nd Easily My Most Favorite Moment Of This Season , WHAT A GOAL , ND THEN AN AMAZING CELEBRATION , ONLY KING ABIDAL :)

GET WELL SOON ABI :)
#AnimsAbi

WAITING ANTICIPATIVELY

SYED SOHAIB

CULEAN :)

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Top 10 MOST HATED LIST

Heyyyyyyyyyy

M back again with another one of my shenanigans (Yes I had to look up the spelling for this word on Google) :P . This time I bring to you

Dun

Dun

Dun

Top 10 MOST HATED PEOPLE Of Mine

Before I start this I have some things to tell

1. This list DOES NOT include any real life person I have met because that would get a little too personal

2. This list ONLY includes "THINGS" that people call "Celebrities & Groups" in English

3. I am fully responsible for this list and AL QAEDA is NOT behind me :P

4. I LOVE PAKISTAN ( Just for the record )

Now lets start with the list and here we go

10: Himesh Reshamiya

This position had quiet a tough fight and I had saved it for all those who are an insult to music with Lady Gaga, Jonas Brothers & Jay Sean fighting for the spot but this man was just tooooo powerful to take it from them. Let me introduce to you the nasal singer Himesh reshamiya. He did one song which was "Ashiq Banaya Aap Nay" and I DONT KNOW HOW he got sooooo succesful. He sings from his nose, his lyrics are stupid, half of his song have the same words going over and over and over again and his music just don't get me started on that failed 1350's music. Himesh please I BEG YOU leave singing and wait wait wait he has now started acting too?? :-S ......... Yes folks its true judgement day is getting near as we speak.

9. Ali Saleem

Man? Begum Nawazish Ali? Or Just Plain ___________ ........ I dnt knw but he/she/it ends up on this list because the 'thing' is just trying to protest against what ALLAH made him/her/it. He/she/it openly wears a semi women dress not on just his/her/its show but everywhere he/she/it goes. He/she/it also took this avatar to India when he/she/it went to participate in that STUPID show called Big Boss....... A TOTAL DISGRACE TO PAKISTAN

8. Jose Mourinho & Arsene Wenger

If looked Individually I don't hate them to the extent that they would end up on this list but a if combined a creature such as 'Jose Wenger' or 'Arsene Mourinho' is surely a thing that I WOULD HATE A LOT. Arsene Wenger on one hand who still can't bear the 4-1 whupping that Barca gave to them LAST YEAR and keeping it on his ego and doing EVERYTHING anti-barca at the moment including not allowing Cesc Fabregas to follow his dream and come to Barcelona.

Then on the other hand there is Jose Mourinho the manager who HATES Barcelona through & through. Although it was Barcelona that brought him up but right now the major goal of his life is to somehow take Barcelona to second position. He did that very well with Inter by eliminating Barcelona in the semi finals and I HATE HIM for that but in the recent El Clasico , welllll :P :P to read that go to " http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2010/11/hi-five-to-humiliation-for-madrid.html " to read the full story. All I would like to say to mourinho is "HI FIVE" :P HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

PEP GUARDIOLA RULES

7. MATHIRA

Alright since this is a family blog I won't be posting ANY pics of mathira because there is NO picture of her thats DECENT. Not even a single one and she is just absolutely unbelievable and she is so proud of doing this and thinks that what shex doing is perfect and those who are stopping are wrong and hosts like the one on Samaa and ARY Digital are encouraging her on wearing shorter the clothes and call her that shex bold to take steps like these. Ufffffffffffffff

6. Robert Pattinson

The jiggly vampire :P ......... HOW CAN I NOT include this man or thing in this list. Since the twilight series has been released he has been a pain to our ears from GIRLS & Other kind of men from all over the world. Robert pattinson a.k.a Edward Cullen ............ AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH....... LADIES I WILL SAY IT TODAY HE IS NOT A MAN ND THATX IT

5. BCCI

By BCCI what I indirectly mean to say is INDIAN CRICKET .......... Complete. A-Z of it. They think they are such good at it while they certainly aren't. Pakistan has shown to them again and again that they suck. Always going against Pakistani cricket like they think they are the boss. Not bidding for the KINGS OF T20 in IPL that was just hillarious and it haunted them soooooo bad. Then having players like Srinath, Ashish Nehra and Virender sehwag whose face shows their absolute "KAMEENAPAN". The board is always after cricket board and they are SOLELY responsible for Pakistan being stripped from the World Cup hosts. I HATE INDIAN CRICKET

4. JUSTIN BEIBER

The pic says it all, the most funniest pic among the top 10. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. Justin Beiber thinks he is a singer? WHATTA JOKE. He is an insult to music I could've put him into the number 10 spot which was reserved for music insults like Lady Gaga, Jonas brothers and Jay Sean but this guy is another level of insult. I mean its his age to learn how to tie his shoe laces and climb on swings and eat lollipops BUT HEX ACTUALLY RUINING IT FOR EVERYBODY. I mean who calls "Like baby oooooohhhhhh oooooohhhhh" MUSIC?? UNBELIEVABLE. Plus this isn't the only list he has added himself to but he has also hit that MOST SEARCHED WOMEN ON GOOGLE list and has happily made it to the number 7 Position. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. DO I NEED TO SAY MORE?

3. VEENA MALIK

ALRIGHT, TO HELL WITH A FAMILY BLOG, ALL KIDS PLEASE CLOSE YOUR EYES AND SKIP TO THE NEXT CATEGORY AND ONLY THOSE PROCEED WHO AGREE TO THIS LINE "VEENA MALIK IS A FEMALE DOG"

ALRIGHT FOR THOSE WHO HAVE PROCEEDED LETS CONTINUE WHO THE HELL DOES SHE THINK SHE IS? UNBELIEVABLE. SHE DRINKS BEER, SHE WEARS SHORT CLOTHES, SHE INSULTS PAKISTANI FAST BOWLER ASIF, SHE SAYS SHE WANTS TO BE INDIA'S DAUGHTER IN LAW, SHE CONFESSES HER LOVE WITH AN INDIAN GUY, SHE DOES ABSOLUTE VULGAR STUFF ON A SHOW AND THEN SHE HAS THE NERVE TO DEFEND HERSELF? TO TOP IT ALL SHE HAS COME BACK TO PAKISTAN AND WILL DEFEND HER SELF IN A PRESS CONFERENCE? PLEASEEEEEEEEE SOMEBODY ANYBODY SHOOT HER WITH A BLOODY BAZOOKA. BLOW HER APART, SHEX A DISGRACE TO OUR NATION. WHO CAN GO THAT LOW TO GET SOME MONEY? ABSOLUTELY DISGRACEFUL AND EMBARRASSING AND SHAMEFUL.......... I HATE YOU VEENA, I HATE YOUR BLOODY GUTS, I WILL KILL YOU....... PLEASE SHARE & RETWEET THIS BLOG SO MUCH SO THAT SHE GETS TO READ IT. I WILL KILL HER IN A LIVE SHOW IF I GET THE CHANCE, I WILL BURN HER ALIVE AND THEN LAUGH AND SAY "BURN VEENA BURNNNNNNN".... I AM STILL BEING VERY DECENT EVEN MY MOM HAS SAID LOTS BOUT HER THAT SHE NEVER SPEAKS ON SUCH TOPICS

2. CRISTIANO RONALDO A.K.A SHITTIANO RO-NAA-LAADO

Well he comes on second for a reason but first for those people who like to compare Messi with this guy. Just one comment from Sevilla's president and then I will move forward "Its blasphemy to compare 'Messi' A great among the greats to Ronaldo JUST A good player"

Now people have asked me again and again why do I hate Ronaldo so much, he scores goals all the damn time, his free kicks are just unbelievable but still u hate him, why? Today let me answer in just one line

Ans: BECAUSE I LOVE FOOTBALL

Ronaldo is a good player, no doubt he has scored unbelievable amount of goals and how he scores them is just breathtaking. His skills of dribbling are just paramount (Dont know if thats a word but wanted to use it :P) BUT Hex a disgrace to football, he dives, cries, cheats , has no respect for other teams, has no respect for other players and has no respect for football. When he starts to loose he starts crying literally like a baby and then he starts to cheat, he dives all the time. He could get Olympic Gold in diving competitions, he pushes and does stupid fouls, he has no respect for anyone including fans, players and even coaches. He pushed Guardiola during the latest El Clasico when Barca were whupping Madrid, WHO THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE IS? People would be surprise to know that I used to be a ronaldo fan. I thought that his name is ronaldo too just like the Brazil one and he will be just like him and now I say he is a disgrace to the name Ronaldo. That is exactly why I call him SHITTIANO RO-NAA-LAADO --> (Don't Cry Poor Baby)

1. PAKISTANI POLITICIANS

The number 1 spot belongs to NOT 1, NOT 2, NOT 3 but a whole bunch of people known as Pakistan's politicians. These people have ruined the country, they fight above the line just to show us but below the line they are all together looting our nation together and taking profits in anything they can get. Poor is getting poorer and rich are getting richer. Poor have no gas, electricity, water and even basic necessities like food have taxes on them but their horses have a whole doctor team and get treated like KINGS. DISGRACEFUL, SHAMEFUL............ COME ON THE YOUTH OF PAKISTAN LETS GET UP........... LETS DO THIS........... LETS DESTROY THEM AND GET THEM DOWN ON THEIR KNEES AND SAVE OUR COUNTRY

WELL THATS THE END

ENDING WITH PICS AND SUBTITLES OF THE PEOPLE ABOVE

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TILL NEXT TIME

X Y'ALL

____________________________________________________________________

YES KILL HIM

YOU WOULD CRY HARDER THAN THAT WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU

THE ULTIMATE BEAUTY

HIS TRUE FACE

AWWWWWWWWWWW

LOL

WHOSE THE RABID ANIMAL? I PICK 'B'

LOVE IS IN THE AIR

AHEM AHEM MOURINHOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Flirts : The Stereotypes

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy

First things first, m FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Second thing: Congratulations to Lionel Messi for becoming Ballon D'or second straight year, I think Xavi deserved it but Xavi & Iniesta are already legends. Let Messi become one for now. So gooooooo the magical trio for the catalans :)

Third Thing: M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Alright now guess whose back? Yeah I know Shawn Michaels returned in WWE but guess again

Yeah I knw Kaka is back from injury in Real Madrid but alright one more guess

NO NO NO M not talking about the return of Beyblade series on cartoon network I was talking about me & my blogs but guess nobody missed them? eh?

Aaaahhh who cares? M still gonna write blogs and you will read em like you always have, you got no choice........ muwahahahahahahahaha

Anywayyyyyyyy...... I was thinking and thinking and thought of many blog topics but then which one to write 1st? Then I thought of this topic and here we go

Flirts.......... Aaaaaahhhh flirts one of the fastly increasing populations of the world. Everyday we see new kind of flirts coming in trying their stuff, while some fail at what they do but the others oh well the others are the ones who don't have to roam around alone.

First lets see what flirting is?

Ans: Flirting is a 1991 Australian coming of age film about a romance between two teenagers starring Noah Taylor & Nicole kidman

Oh wait thats not the definition........... darn u Google....... Lets try again to see what is flirting?

Ans: Flirting is non-physical romantic communication between two people to negotiate mutual attraction through body language and verbal tactics. It is an initiation ritual of human mating and consists of a playful sequence of reveals and challenges that serve to communicate, test, and amplify attraction. Revealing attraction is accomplished primarily through specific modes of body language that indicate contact readiness (hair flicking, eye contact, brief touching, open stances, proximity etc.) and vocal tone (pace, volume, intonation). Challenges (teasing, questions, qualifying, feigned disinterest) serve to increase tension, test intention and congruity.

Alright m pretty much sure that half of that went over your head :P

That is EXACTLY WHY PLEASE use Wikipedia ONLY when YOU CAN :P

So now let me define in simple plain english what is flirting

Ans: It is the ritual when a boy/girl (YES GIRLS FLIRT THERE I SAID IT) come and talk to the other gender in an odd manner trying to impress them with that style is called flirting

Now lets consider the types

1. Cheap Flirts (90% Boys & 10% Girls)

"Is it hot in here or is it just you" well maybe take a look at your dialogue and maybe you might know why are you feeling that way? Oh come onnnnn ........ Seriously you think these work? Well it deserves a slap + heel combo to every cheap flirt out there. These are the ones who have to flirt with EVERY one out there. My university has them and two of them even got their pictures on the new campus advertisement, no wonder :P. They are not just a bad name to the ancient name of flirting but give a bad name to generally that gender as well mostly boys.

2. Amateur Flirts (75% Boys & 25% Girls)

"At last I finally found the perfect girl" ........ Yea I know all you amateur flirts out there waiting for your turn and to tell you the fact you people are the biggest & largest amount of flirts in this category. They are fine but the problem with them is that they don't know when to say what? Their timing is a complete disaster and they can blurt out the most stupidest thing to the most awesomest thing but majorly at the wrong time. Amateur flirts are everywhere and we don't need to go look finding for one just say in your class "OH DAMN" and the ones who look around searching for a girl, VALLA.

3. Nerdy Flirts (30% Boys & 70% Girls)

"Am very good at history so I must be good at dates" Yeah when someone speaks that line he/she MUST have a CGPA above 3.4 Plus ATLEAST. Since many boys are not capable to pull the feat of a 3.4 GPA so its mainly the girls who fall in this category. Starting from notes and rising above is their general method but the problem is that they are only successful if the other one is of their kind too. A nerd can only be good around a nerd otherwise they are not even considered humans, some alien hybrid specie that came down to earth to ruin our grades :P

4. Cool Flirts (65% Boys & 35% Girls)

"Hey flattery will get you everywhere so keep talking" Yea thatx flirting a very diffrent kind of it though. Cool flirts just stay cool and let it be with, they don't care what happens and if they loose one girl/guy for it. They will remain cool and let the others drop for them. To be a cool flirt you need some basic necessities

1. LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF MONEY

The rest comes with the 1st neccesity, below I have given a pic of a cool flirt but am seriously not sure if "IT" is a guy , girl OR? :P

5. Professional Flirts (50% Boys & 50% Girls)

"OMG LOOK AT THAT BOY/GIRL, HE/SHE IS AN ANGEL, HE/SHE IS SOOOOOO NICE" .......... Let me break it down to you people there are too kind of nice people

1. Actually nice people

2. Professional flirts

Both have almost the same kind of reputation in a society but BOY do they have the different methods to achieve it. One simple example winning the player of the year award in FIFA :P

1. Lionel Messi (Actually Nice People)

2. Shittiano Ronaldo (The other kind)

These are the MOST Rarest kind and its very hard to find "NICE" people anyway and among these nice people then these come. Sheesh its a hard world to live in. Well no piece of advice because these people are very lethal and they are at the best at what they do so you can't resist. They are called the Pros for a certain reason and everybody should respect that.

Well thats it from my side for this time

I know I have lost my touch a little but will be back with more soon

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Till Next Time (Keep waiting for an upcoming stunner)

X Y'All

*HI FIVE* TO HUMILIATION FOR MADRID

Hey ALL

M Backkkk........... ALREADY? NOT ANOTHER ONE OF HIS ANTICS AGAIN? DIDN'T HE POSTED HIS LAST BLOG A WEEK AGO?

Yes I know what you are thinking so stop thinking and start reading :P

Tuesday 30th November

1:00 Am

Ten Sports

YES , That was the time when the FC Barcelona fans started shouting at the top of their throats in support of their team while Madrid fans (Real Ones not the Glory Hunters) covered their eyes in horror of what happened right before their eyes

90 Minutes Of SHEAR DOMINANCE

90 Minutes Of TOTAL ANNIHILATION

90 Minutes Of BEAUTIFUL FOOTBALL

90 Minutes Of COMPLETE HUMILIATION

90 Minutes Of BARCELONA

Yes, It was one of the best nights and for me maybe even bigger than when Barcelona whupped Manchester United 2-0 to win Champions League.

Now I want to discuss some parts of the game

1. Goal Number 1 --> Xavi On Iniesta Assist

Well only two words......... Absolutely BEAUTIFUL

When two BIGGEST players in the world meet together and 2 CERTAIN contenders for THE BEST PLAYER OF THE YEAR it has to be BEAUTIFUL

The X-ray vision pass by Iniesta, then the juggle by Xavi and then the beautiful beautiful finish

XAVI CELEBRATING

2. Goal Number 2 --> Pedro On David Villa Assist

WHATTA A Run By David Villa totally amazed Sergio Ramos & Casilias for Pedro to finish one of the most EASIEST goals of his life

3. Shittiano Ronaldo's Little Antic

Now WHO THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE IS? Fights happen between players but YOU CANNOT I REPEAT YOU JUST CANNOT TOUCH A COACH. I Completely back Victor Valdes from whupping some sense into his peanut sized brain. I never respected this man because of his sportsman spirit which is equal to the size of red blood cell's nano version but now I thought he is a good player and now that goes into the ENDLESS PIT

VALDES SHOULD HAVE SHOT HIM DOWN

4. Goal Number 3 & 4 --> David Villa On Lionel Messi Assist

Alrighty , do you have ANY words for Lionel Messi's visionary genius and Villa's finishing excellence? I know that I DON'T HAVE ANY

Told everyone that GODZILLA is a thing of the past & now its MESSIVILLA a monster that ripped Madrid's defense to shreds.

TWO of the most amazing through balls by now UNARGUABLY the BEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD Lionel Messi and two of the best finishes by UNARGUABLY Spain's best striker EVER David Villa :) ........ MESSI'S GENIUS BROUGHT THE CURTAINS UP & VILLA'S BEAUTY BROUGHT THE CURTAINS DOWN

VILLA CELEBRATING WITH THE CATALANS

5. Goal Number 5 --> Jeffren Suarez On Bojan Krikic Assist

The Final nail in the coffin of the Galacticos

The Final slap on the face of the "Special One"

Bojan's beautiful searching ball for Iniesta....... the Master missed it but the disciple didn't. Lurking around Jeffren came for the ball and within 5 minutes of playing time he chipped one over Casillias to make it 5-0 as Barcelona fans and players all around rose their palms showing the 'FIVE' ......... EPIC MOMENT

I give this the MOMENT of the game

JEFFREN KNOWS HE HAS COMPLETED THE DESTRUCTION

6. RAMOS'S ANGER SPREE

All Barcelona fans were celebrating, jumping, dancing as Messi was again taking the ball with utmost brilliance towards the Real Madrid area when all of a sudden in mere seconds there were some bodies going down. 1st was Ramos's absolutely horrendous tackle on Messi , then when Puyol came to defend Messi , Ramos shoved him in the face, then he pushed Xavi while he exited after being shown a RED CARD , Casilias also took his shot at Pique and shoved him. ABSOLUTELY DISGRACEFUL FOOTBALL BY REAL MADRID , SHAMEFUL

In my point of view it wasn't the 5 goals that disgraced Real madrid , no no no those five goals humiliated them

It was their crying and bad sportsman spirit that disgraced them. Shittiano push then ramos. In total of 7 yellows cards and 1 red card

SHAMEFUL

DISGRACEFUL

TOTALLY BOOOOOOOO

I WOULD GIVE HIM 3 RED CARDS IF I WAS THE REFREE

7. THE SPECIAL ONE?

Okay in this year's build up all we got to hear from madrid fans was Mourinho this and Mourinho that. Special one this and Special one that.......... Remember Mourinho did this and he did that. Well now I stand and ask if Mourinho is the "SPECIAL ONE" then Guardiola is "SPECIAL KILLER"

GUARDIOLA OWNS EL CLASICO NOW

5 out of 5

Perfectttttttt

Those people saying that it was Mourinho's 1st El Clasico

Remember Guardiola had a 1st too bt he didn't loose and give stupid and lame excuses

From next time it will be

El Clasico ® --> Barcelona VS Real Madrid

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED GUARDIOLA & INC

THE MASTER MIND

8. LIONEL MESSI HAS COMPETITION?

ALRIGHT M WRITING THIS IN BOLD SO YOU ALL CAN GET THIS LOUD & CLEAR

LIONEL MESSI HAS NO COMPETITION, HE IS THE BEST IN THE WORLD AT WHAT HE DOES. PLEASE NEVER EVER COMPARE HIM WITH RONALDO. HE HAS CLEARLY SHOWN THIS NOW AT 4 DIFFRENT OCCASIONS

NOBODY EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER COUNT RONALDO IN HIS LEAGUE

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THATS IT FOR THIS TIME

ENDING WITH SOME MEMORABLE PICS OF THIS YEAR'S 1ST EL CLASICO WITH CAPTIONS

TILL NEXT TIME

VISCA EL BARCA

X Y'ALL

ALL HE COULD DO WAS STAND & WATCH

GUARDIOLA THINKING "MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

RONALDO THINKING "WHY CAN'T I BE LIKE THAT GUY? MOMMMMMMMYYYYYY"

CASILIAS THINKING "PLEASE STOP IT, I ASK FOR MERCY"

THE MOMENT WHEN RONALDO LOST IT ALL

VALDES SLAPPING MADRID

I LOVE BARCA TOO :) VISCA EL BARCA

THE DEATH CERTIFICATE :)

ABIDAL TO RONALDO "DUR FITTAY MUN"