Main Metro Hun, Main Zaroori Hun! (Poem)

Asalam o Alikum Everyone!

So I am back with a post and since this is on metro bus and also the fact that only Pakistanis will understand it so I will post parts of it in Urdu as well as English.

So after being tortured, beaten and bruised by the construction of this so called "METRO BUS" for almost more than a year now, I argued with some PML (N) supporters about the use of this bus, arguing that Electricity, Water, Gas, Education, Terrorism are much much MUCH bigger problems that needed to be solved as soon as possible instead of wasting money and material on a bus that can be saved for later. Not that its not a helpful project but it can be delayed at the moment. All the supporters said "INFRASTRUCTURE IS IMPORTANT"

OKAY! So Infrastructure is important. Fine! But what about the existing Infrastructure? Is it perfect? Is it perfect enough to the government to build new? Let's have a look shall we? A little poem I wrote, It doesn't rhyme in many places but aah well, I am no Ghalib!

Airport Jaati road par 2 2 inch key garhay hain

Gaariyan neechay lagti hain, baar baar jhatkay lagtay hain

Magar iss par koi nazar nahin, tou mei bhi aankh pher leti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

IJP Road hai jahan hazaaron gaariyan chalti hain

Din main har waqt rush hota hai, raat bhi non stop chalti hain

Magar iss road par aik bhi light nahin, iss baat pey kaan naa dharti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

Dharno nay kiye saaray karoobaar band, hakoomat cheekh cheekh kehti thi

Laugon ka nuqsaan huwa hai, press conference kar key kehti thi

Saal sey blue area ka business tabah hai, iss baat pey kaan naa dharti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

Lahore ko Paris bana liya abb Barakahu ki baari hai

Shehbaz Sharif nay Josh-e-Khitabat main aisi bhi chuss maari hai

Bijli, gas, paani, roads sab tabah magar, iss baat pey kaan naa dharti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

Expressway key baad hai highway aata jahan laakhon laug rehtay hain

Puray highway par aik bhi light nahin, ghup andheray main jaatay hain

Metro ki lights din main bhi chalti hain iss baat pey kaan naa dharti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

Aik saal sey khuwaar huay hain, traffic jams main phans phans kar

Metro bannay waali hai bas iss maheenay main sun sun kar

6 deadlines guzar chuki hain iss baat pey kaan naa dharti hun

Nawaz shehbaz kehtay hain main metro hun, main zaroori hun

That's it for me for this time

Don't forget to like my page and give your feedback

https://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

Till Next Time

Adios!

Creeps: The Stereotypes 2

Hello Everyone!

I am back with another part of my previous successful blog "Creeps: The Stereotypes" http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2013/07/creeps-stereotypes.html with its Part 2.

Although before the blog I want to say something. Whatever happened in Rawalpindi on 10th Muharram was terrible and shouldn't have happened and we need to see that it was a pre-planned attempt to create sectarian feud in Pakistan. Let's stand up against it and show that we are united! ALL MUSLIMS IN PAKISTAN ARE UNITED! Let's fail their attempt to break down Pakistan.

Now back to the topic!

Girls are still being haunted by guys and "profiles" from all over the place and I searched around and finally through a good source got some more screenshots of Creeps.

1. The Sheikh

Ya Habib! Ya Rafiq! I used to think Sheikhs only buy items but now they are out buying friends on facebook as well? Ouch! Prince Fahad of Saudia Arabia should probably kill himself after this photo leaks out on the internet! Such a low standard for a royalty!

2. Beauty & The Beast

He is basically living in Greece and is a beauty admirer and just can't stand the fact of not admiring beauty when he sees it. I can bet he has a DSLR and he lives in Rawalpindi and the only time he was Greece was under his car.


3. Chor Ki Daarhi Main Tinka (Guilty Conscious) 

Now this guy is trying to explain that he "landed" in that girl's profile by magic and he is not a stalker, pervert or anything, its all just magic how he is attracted to this girl. Btw he has also studied an online course from Hogwarts.

4. No Words!!!

I .............. Okay ............ But .............. WHY? :S

5. The Number Guy

A much more direct and proper approach. Just give in your number and wait for the girl to open her FB inbox and get surprised all of a sudden on discovering the number of a stud and quickly adding it on her mobile and sending in a text. GENIUS! FLAWLESS!

6. Personality Disorder

First he goes all Shahrukh Khan from Kal ho na ho on her and then he goes all Emraan Hashmi from well his every damn movie on her. A clear personality disorder case. Choclate Girl? Seriously bro?

7. Religious Scholar

In a time of crisis this is the kind of religious scholars we need! He is above religions, outer beauty and races. He transcends all boundaries and believes in true relations that are based on heart. 

He is the hero we need but not the one we deserve!

8. Wedding Ad!

A clear wedding ad! DUDE! THIS IS FACEBOOK! What you are looking for is pakistanmatrimony.com

9. O M G !

"U r a wish dat ppl wish for n live in hope of it but only a few can b blessed and i want ...."

I need to stop before I start crying. Isn't he just .......... dreamy?............. Girls?

10. Strangers

Our mom's have always told us to never talk to strangers and probably their mom's told them too! That's why the first thing they have done is to end the "strangeness" between them and the targeted girl! Nice move guys!

That is it for this time! Don't forget to like my Facebook page! & PEOPLE MAKE IT ACTIVE!

https://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

Till Next Time!

Stay United! :D

Ending With Some Honorable Mentions!

Pindi Boyses + Army = Sc3N3 aWn! S1r Y3s S1r!

Acrocced?

Poor Bloke!

HE IS THE SAME PERSON! SAME EXACT PERSON IN MY PREVIOUS BLOG! TO ANOTHER GIRL! (WIN MOMENT FOR MY BLOG)

Izzat Daar Bhai Check Karo Zara!
P.S : Booo-Hooo

Pakistan Will Develop When ......

Hello Everyone!

After a long long long break! The last time I wrote a blog was in July and that was also written by someone else. I thought about some topics but just couldn't write stuff but then while on my way to Gujrat in a train I thought up of some points. Some points that I believe are the actual full stops in Pakistan's way to development. Somethings that we need to do instead of blaming everything on the government.

The points are as follows


PAKISTAN WILL DEVELOP WHEN ......

• When we will play our "National sports" instead of using it as a weapon in fights or for breaking stuff in protests.
• When we will respect our own language more than other foreign languages.
• When we will stop being slaves to other cultures.
• When we will learn that "Revolution / Inquilaab" does not mean a one day Jalsa or long march.
• When we will learn that "Inquilaab" means to change one self before trying to change the world.
• When we will learn that "WE" elect the government.
• When we will embrace our own culture.
• When we will learn about our history and find out how this country came into being.
• When a "bat" will be a sports equipment and not a political icon.
• When a "book" will be something we read instead of voting for it.
• When we will embrace our religion instead of modernizing it.
• When we will follow our religion the way it is supposed to be instead of editing it according to our own stupid mind sets.
• When we will learn that we have to give Pakistan, Pakistan does not owe us anything.
• When we will learn that Pakistan is a gift to us, a huge gift and the more we take care of it, the less it is.
• When we will be Pakistanis first before being a Punjabi, Balochistani, Sindhi and Pakhtun.
• When we will be Muslims first before being a Shia, Sunni, Deobandi, Wahabi.
• WHEN WE WILL RESPECT PAKISTAN!

That's it for this time. Soon will come out with another humor blog!

Don't forget to like the facebook page!

https://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans?ref=hl 

Till Next Time
X Y'all

Creeps: The Stereotypes

Hello Everyone

Its time, I am back! Its been ages since I wrote a humor blog, the last one being wayyy back in January. Mechanical engineering degree was in its final moments and now its complete :) THANK GOD! I am officially an Engineer now :)

First things first! I finally hit the 1 LAKH ALL TIME VIEWS POINT! So I decided to make a facebook page for my blog cause even my fridge has one! So go and hit like here " http://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans "

Now let's get to the topic. Girls from all over the world have been a target for perverts on social networking websites. While some "abnormal" girls actually enjoy this crap, I contacted the "normal" ones and asked them to share their experiences with me regarding perverts sending them messages over social networking websites. The results ..................... Well the top 10 I found are below!

Note: I am erasing the name of the girls but not erasing the name of the guys!

1. The Fraandship Me

 These are the basic types, asking girls all the time for Fraandhips and accepting their request. Even to the extent that they even keep asking girls to add them on Twitter. *Face palms*


2. The Despo Routine

Hasnat Ali here is showing a perfect example of desperation. He shows that he is in desperate need of a friend like all the boys in the world just died yesterday and only this girl can fulfill the void that is his life now without a friend and within this he also puts words like "Hook up" and "night stand" , lets all stand up for this genius.

3. The Suggestion Maker

Now he is the guy who is trying to suggest his way into a girl's friend circle and one thing we all know is that girls HATE suggestions. Plus this guy is totally opposing what he is saying while saying that jeans suits her in the first comments and later asking her not to wear jeans. We have a short term memory loss genius at our hands.

4. The Nice Guy

How to get a girl to become your friend? SIMPLE! Show her that you are a nice guy and my friend over here is trying this, introducing his name like his profile doesn't show it already and assuring that he is a nice guys over and over again. Seriously? If it worked then tell me too.

5. Straight To The Point

Here our friend is going straight to the point and is sooooo honest, even telling her right away that he likes her sooo much but well not honest enough to show even his own name or profile? He names his profile LIFE? Where we all tell him that he should get one instead.

6. The Lover

Now this guy hot soooo heart broken that he actually had to delete his facebook account after the rejection from this girl! These people show that they have totally fallen for the girl and can't be more helplessly in love and if you ask them what love is. They will surely answer "Jo Amir Khan ko Kareena Sey Huwa Tha In 3 Idiots" SHEESH!

7. tH3 g3n1u$ p1nD1

It took me hardly 5 minutes to write the complete blog but it took me a whole minute to write just the title of this one. The Pindi boyses know their shit when its comes to writing like the guy has written above. Its just v3Ry $sPh1sTiC@t3D !!!

8. The Nelson Mandelas

After what he has said, do I need to say more??

9. The Sympathy Votes

His friend is sick and all he is doing is going around messaging girls on facebook while he talks about his friend in only 30% of the message and in 70% he is actually talking to the girl


10. The Emotional Blackmailer

These people try and emotionally blackmail the girls into sending just one message. Clever girls don't fall for it and they end up deleting their accounts from Facebook. 

After all these I am soooo glad that I am a guy and don't have to deal with this crap every single day. My heart goes out to all the girls out there who have to deal with this crap day in and day out. Ending this blog with some honorable mentions of messages that I also want to show to my readers :)

The Shair! (Poet)

The Vulgar! (but a genius reply)

Seriously?

He shows that he hates her but still he couldn't restrain from messaging her!

Trying to be Sarcastic! (Fail)

Thats it for this time!

Again please like my new page!
http://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

Till Next Time
X Y'All