Creeps: The Stereotypes 2

Hello Everyone!

I am back with another part of my previous successful blog "Creeps: The Stereotypes" http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2013/07/creeps-stereotypes.html with its Part 2.

Although before the blog I want to say something. Whatever happened in Rawalpindi on 10th Muharram was terrible and shouldn't have happened and we need to see that it was a pre-planned attempt to create sectarian feud in Pakistan. Let's stand up against it and show that we are united! ALL MUSLIMS IN PAKISTAN ARE UNITED! Let's fail their attempt to break down Pakistan.

Now back to the topic!

Girls are still being haunted by guys and "profiles" from all over the place and I searched around and finally through a good source got some more screenshots of Creeps.

1. The Sheikh

Ya Habib! Ya Rafiq! I used to think Sheikhs only buy items but now they are out buying friends on facebook as well? Ouch! Prince Fahad of Saudia Arabia should probably kill himself after this photo leaks out on the internet! Such a low standard for a royalty!

2. Beauty & The Beast

He is basically living in Greece and is a beauty admirer and just can't stand the fact of not admiring beauty when he sees it. I can bet he has a DSLR and he lives in Rawalpindi and the only time he was Greece was under his car.


3. Chor Ki Daarhi Main Tinka (Guilty Conscious) 

Now this guy is trying to explain that he "landed" in that girl's profile by magic and he is not a stalker, pervert or anything, its all just magic how he is attracted to this girl. Btw he has also studied an online course from Hogwarts.

4. No Words!!!

I .............. Okay ............ But .............. WHY? :S

5. The Number Guy

A much more direct and proper approach. Just give in your number and wait for the girl to open her FB inbox and get surprised all of a sudden on discovering the number of a stud and quickly adding it on her mobile and sending in a text. GENIUS! FLAWLESS!

6. Personality Disorder

First he goes all Shahrukh Khan from Kal ho na ho on her and then he goes all Emraan Hashmi from well his every damn movie on her. A clear personality disorder case. Choclate Girl? Seriously bro?

7. Religious Scholar

In a time of crisis this is the kind of religious scholars we need! He is above religions, outer beauty and races. He transcends all boundaries and believes in true relations that are based on heart. 

He is the hero we need but not the one we deserve!

8. Wedding Ad!

A clear wedding ad! DUDE! THIS IS FACEBOOK! What you are looking for is pakistanmatrimony.com

9. O M G !

"U r a wish dat ppl wish for n live in hope of it but only a few can b blessed and i want ...."

I need to stop before I start crying. Isn't he just .......... dreamy?............. Girls?

10. Strangers

Our mom's have always told us to never talk to strangers and probably their mom's told them too! That's why the first thing they have done is to end the "strangeness" between them and the targeted girl! Nice move guys!

That is it for this time! Don't forget to like my Facebook page! & PEOPLE MAKE IT ACTIVE!

https://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

Till Next Time!

Stay United! :D

Ending With Some Honorable Mentions!

Pindi Boyses + Army = Sc3N3 aWn! S1r Y3s S1r!

Acrocced?

Poor Bloke!

HE IS THE SAME PERSON! SAME EXACT PERSON IN MY PREVIOUS BLOG! TO ANOTHER GIRL! (WIN MOMENT FOR MY BLOG)

Izzat Daar Bhai Check Karo Zara!
P.S : Booo-Hooo

Creeps: The Stereotypes

Hello Everyone

Its time, I am back! Its been ages since I wrote a humor blog, the last one being wayyy back in January. Mechanical engineering degree was in its final moments and now its complete :) THANK GOD! I am officially an Engineer now :)

First things first! I finally hit the 1 LAKH ALL TIME VIEWS POINT! So I decided to make a facebook page for my blog cause even my fridge has one! So go and hit like here " http://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans "

Now let's get to the topic. Girls from all over the world have been a target for perverts on social networking websites. While some "abnormal" girls actually enjoy this crap, I contacted the "normal" ones and asked them to share their experiences with me regarding perverts sending them messages over social networking websites. The results ..................... Well the top 10 I found are below!

Note: I am erasing the name of the girls but not erasing the name of the guys!

1. The Fraandship Me

 These are the basic types, asking girls all the time for Fraandhips and accepting their request. Even to the extent that they even keep asking girls to add them on Twitter. *Face palms*


2. The Despo Routine

Hasnat Ali here is showing a perfect example of desperation. He shows that he is in desperate need of a friend like all the boys in the world just died yesterday and only this girl can fulfill the void that is his life now without a friend and within this he also puts words like "Hook up" and "night stand" , lets all stand up for this genius.

3. The Suggestion Maker

Now he is the guy who is trying to suggest his way into a girl's friend circle and one thing we all know is that girls HATE suggestions. Plus this guy is totally opposing what he is saying while saying that jeans suits her in the first comments and later asking her not to wear jeans. We have a short term memory loss genius at our hands.

4. The Nice Guy

How to get a girl to become your friend? SIMPLE! Show her that you are a nice guy and my friend over here is trying this, introducing his name like his profile doesn't show it already and assuring that he is a nice guys over and over again. Seriously? If it worked then tell me too.

5. Straight To The Point

Here our friend is going straight to the point and is sooooo honest, even telling her right away that he likes her sooo much but well not honest enough to show even his own name or profile? He names his profile LIFE? Where we all tell him that he should get one instead.

6. The Lover

Now this guy hot soooo heart broken that he actually had to delete his facebook account after the rejection from this girl! These people show that they have totally fallen for the girl and can't be more helplessly in love and if you ask them what love is. They will surely answer "Jo Amir Khan ko Kareena Sey Huwa Tha In 3 Idiots" SHEESH!

7. tH3 g3n1u$ p1nD1

It took me hardly 5 minutes to write the complete blog but it took me a whole minute to write just the title of this one. The Pindi boyses know their shit when its comes to writing like the guy has written above. Its just v3Ry $sPh1sTiC@t3D !!!

8. The Nelson Mandelas

After what he has said, do I need to say more??

9. The Sympathy Votes

His friend is sick and all he is doing is going around messaging girls on facebook while he talks about his friend in only 30% of the message and in 70% he is actually talking to the girl


10. The Emotional Blackmailer

These people try and emotionally blackmail the girls into sending just one message. Clever girls don't fall for it and they end up deleting their accounts from Facebook. 

After all these I am soooo glad that I am a guy and don't have to deal with this crap every single day. My heart goes out to all the girls out there who have to deal with this crap day in and day out. Ending this blog with some honorable mentions of messages that I also want to show to my readers :)

The Shair! (Poet)

The Vulgar! (but a genius reply)

Seriously?

He shows that he hates her but still he couldn't restrain from messaging her!

Trying to be Sarcastic! (Fail)

Thats it for this time!

Again please like my new page!
http://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

Till Next Time
X Y'All

Stalking 101

Heyy Alll

Stalking is an art that has been misunderstood by people around the world. It is basically research on people (girls and boys) that has been misinterpreted as spying and now even as a crime. 

As thefreedictionary.com defines stalking as "To pursue by tracking stealthily".

Stealth is considered to be one of the most amazing traits one can have in one's arsenal and if stalking is the prime part of stealth then how can stalking be wrong. Some perverts around the world have just used this art wrong and have given it a bad name. Just like weapons which were used to ensure world peace are now being used as weapons of destruction. The same way stalking has been misunderstood!

Today on behalf of Bilal and I we would like to teach you the art that is stalking.

DISCLAIMER: This course is not for those perverts who will just use these things to search for girls on social networks and search for their pictures. Stalking is an art and it should be given its respect

1. Constant Vigilance All Times

The first and foremost point towards being a good stalker is simple! You have to be vigilant at all times. You can't wait around and let a target come to you. Sometimes you can miss the best of targets if you don't stay vigilant. This is not the same kind of research that you can always come back and find the same. This research changes and updates with time and we have to keep up to the speed of this.

2. Print Screen Is Your Friend

The button on your keyboard that is printed with the letters "PrntScr" is your friend. This maybe not as helpful as a formulae sheet in an exam but sometimes it can come out to be very handy as the evidence in a research.

3. Social Networking Stalking

Now these days the main stalking is happening on facebook and twitter cause basically all of the people are using either of these two networks. The more hidden people use facebook while the more open ones use twitter and those who are leading a double life use both regulalry (including me :P) 

a) Facebook Tickr

The search bar of Facebook is good but for that you have to be in the professional stalker zone to use the search bar efficiently. For this amateur course of stalking I will advise all to be "constantly vigilant" and have an eye on the Facebook tickr. This tickr can let you easily stalk your targets if they are in your friend list. Every activity they do is available on your tickr. They make like pages that will show a lot about them and you can use all this in your research about them. An example can be below where "ONE" of my friends liked a page and was caught :P (Name removed)

b) Tweetdeck

Again searching through Twitter bar takes a lot of practice and I would adivse the beginner stalkers to start with the application Tweetdeck which is available for PCs and Androids. This is the application that will help you find tweets, mentions and followers very easily and quickly as compared to browser Twitter. Got you research project on Twitter? This is the best start to find anything he/she does on twitter. You can even dedicate a coloumn to just their activities. (This part is STRICTLY not for perverts)

4. Google Search

Now sometimes (very rare) do you need to search outside Facebook and Twitter to research for your "Research project" and this is a very amazing tool for research in all fields but it can also be used for researching individuals but this is a very pro level tool and should only be used by professionals or under strict supervision of professional stalkers. Google can take you places but only if you know the right way to use it.

This is it for the first course. I would await all you new stalkers out there to try this and leave feedback and if you want to enroll for regular course then please contact either me or Bilal on twitter

Me --> @SohaibX512

Bilal --> @shbilalm

Till Next Time

Don't Forget To Like The Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/SyedsXtremeShenanigans

X Y'All

Girls : Defense Against The Dark Arts

Heyyyyyyy

http://www.facebook.com/groups/221719674530423/

Well FINALLY I got the topic, sitting around thinking to continue the Men: The Oppressed Souls blog with the reply from the girls side but I will wait for NZ to get free and write that, till then I noticed the amount of girls who abused and literally ran after me to beat me up after that blog so now I decided to write a blog to support girls because you never know my future wife might be among my readers. So this one goes to the girls

Before I need to give one Shout Out

PEP GUARDIOLA

The Myth, The Legend, The Man has finally decided to end things with Barcelona and all I would say to him is THANK YOU PEP!!! THANK YOU ........... Nd Best of luck to Tito Villanova for the future

Well now onto the topic

No matter how much I can STRESS on the fact that men are being oppressed by females all around as you can see in my previous blog http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2012/02/men-oppressed-souls.html

BUT , there is a small percentage of men who are haunting females as well and that haunting is BAD.  So this blog goes out to all those females and ladies who have been haunted at least once by THOSE type of men/boys. This blog ladies is a lesson on how to save yourself from these creeps.

NOTE: This blog is NOT for those girls who enjoy all of this, because trust me there are a lot of girls who do and even become girlfriends through these methods. You are AS disgusting as the guys who do this.

1. POONDS

The majority stand in this category. Boys who don't want to turn into men turn into Poonds instead. Poondi is the local term for checking out girls by the boys. Some boys are good at this Poondi thing and they can check a girl out without the girl even getting a simple hint that she is being checked out while the others are just dumb enough to look at her while she passes by again and again from head to toe

SOLUTION:

Is there a group of boys standing in your way to the cafe or some place checking you out? and shouting names on you? The solution is simple girls, walk pass them without a single drop of weirdness on your face, that place to walk is as much yours as theirs. Basically why these Poonds do this is because they are alone and they have no girls to talk to and by doing this mostly girls turn up to them and call them bad and leave and they get happy that a girl talked to them so they will do it again to you. If you don't give them any sort of reaction then after two-three times they will leave themselves. Just hold your head high and don't even give them a little bit of attention.

2. ONLINE STALKERS

Got a recent friend request or a fb message from a guy saying "Waant to be fraaandshap with me? =D =D <3 " ???  FIRST of all that is a "Pindi Boy" right there :P (Learn the difference). I have seen this through my career with the friends I have had and also with my fake profile (Yes, I ran a fake profile once for fooling my friend reasons :P) Guys jumbling out friend requests like the girl is supposed to accept them and if she does accept it the guys think that accepting a friend request = She accepted my proposal to become my girlfriend.   

SOLUTION:

Ignoring ain't gonna do the trick ladies because they are gonna keep messaging you until you finally loose your temper and say bad stuff to them. The solution to this is simple, a BURNING insult and no no no not one of those "Tumharay ghar main maa behan nahin hai kya? (Don't you have mothers and sisters in your home?)" go for something new. Insult them bad and they will never bother you again because these stalkers ain't the brightest of folks they can't think of comebacks that easily.

3. MOBILE STALKER

Getting a lot of text messages or even calls lately from an unknown number with the same kinds of messages like "fraandshap" or "u R vErY bTfL" or stuff like that *shudders at his own examples* These people are just like online stalkers but more dangerous because online stalkers can affect you only when you are online but these can hunt you all the time because they have your mobile number. 

SOLUTION:

The solution for both online stalkers and mobile stalkers is NOT the same. For an online stalker they know its your profile and if you insult then they know they can't get anything more so they might leave BUT if they get to confirm that it is actually a girl's number with them they will NOT leave anyway. So the simplest most solution is NOT to reply to the messages and if he calls OR make a call and hand over your phone to your brother or your some male friend that you trust and just give them some private time with the stalker. I am sure he will not bother you again.

So that's it for this time

I repeat that this blog is NOT for those girls who tend to enjoy this shit

At the end first a picture of the newborn Aayan Abbas , my cousin Auj a.k.a Queenie's son :)

Nd Then Its A Thank You PEP Guardiola :D

That's it from this time

Till Next Time

Don't Forget To Join The Group

http://www.facebook.com/groups/221719674530423/

X Y'All