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Friday, June 24, 2011

If Super Heroes Were In Pakistan??

Heyyy Alllllll

FIRST THINGS FIRST , HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE MOST TALENTED AND THE BEST FOOTBALLER IN THE HISTORY AND UNIVERSE , LIONEL ANDRES MESSI , YOU ARE JUST UNREAL :)

Yes its another one , Its been holidays but I haven't been able to write a blog amidst all the problems of my bad result, 9-5 internship. Just EXHAUSTING.

Well anyway I am back and this time I was thinking that why don't any super hero come to Pakistan or even India for that matter. Never has the man of steel tried to save a Pakistani in a terrorist attack, never has Spider man stopped any thug from looting in Karachi, Never has Batman tried to stop the most evilest villain of all times (not taking name but I think you all understand ZZZZZZ) in Pakistan. Pakistan has never had a super hero of its own and while India has made two namely Krrish and the upcoming Ra.One still none of them became a super hero in India and while Krrish decided to become a superhero in Singapore the latter Ra.One becomes a hero in U.S.A and U.K. So the question arises that if our well known Superheroes came to Pakistan what would've happened?


1. BATMAN & ROBIN

The dynamic duo which are considered to be one of the most feared Superhero team among all the villains and especially considering the fact that they are without any superpowers but what if they come to Pakistan?

Scenario 1: Fire at multiple buildings in Lahore

Batman: Robin
Robin: Yes Batman!!
Batman: Its been quite sometime since we had a problem, aint it?
Robin: Yes, they said they will ignite the bat beacon when any trouble arises
Batman: Yeah you are right, relaxxx
Over at governor's office
Governor: DAMN THIS LOAD SHEDDING , HOW DO I TURN THIS BEACON ON WITHOUT ANY ELECTRICITY??

Scenario 2: Robbers hiding in store in Liyari Karachi
Batman & Robin catch the bad guys and come back to the place where they parked the car

Batman: Robin??
Robin: Yes Batman!!
Batman: DIDN'T WE PARKED THE CAR RIGHT HERE MAN??
Robin: WHAT WE'VE BEEN ROBBED??
2. SPIDER MAN

The web swinger Spiderman one of the most famous creations of Marvel comics as he swings throughout the city taking out bad guys using his spider like abilities but what if he came to Pakistan?

Scenario: Trouble at night in Lahore Puraani Anarkali

GEO NEWS: Ladies and gentlemen we are bringing you live the scenes from a big hostage situation as some robbers have made the owner and the customers at a store hostage and are asking for some demands and till this moment there is no sign of Spider man. There is no light in this area so its very hard for the rangers to make a move inside and rescue the hostages and we still await the arrival of Spider man
After five minutes

GEO NEWS: Ladies and Gentlemen the light just came but there is still no sign of Spider man as the hostage situation worsens............ wait wait there was a blast in the vicinity and the electricity has again gone in this area we are trying to get details and will inform you as soon as we get information on the blast
After another five minutes

GEO NEWS: Ladies and Gentlemen we are very sad to bring you the news that Spider man is no more among us. He got stuck in wires here in the dark and when light came the shock was too much and the there was a blast in the transformer and Spiderman couldnt survive from the wounds.

HEADLINE : SPIDERMAN's SPIDER SENSE COULDN'T TINGLE BEFORE HE GOT TANGLED :P


3. THE INCREDIBLE HULK

The huge monster that is the Incredible Hulk, when Dr. Bruce Banner gets angry he turns into this monster that is the Hulk

Scenario 1: Pathan Patient At His Clinic

HEADLINES: MANIAC DOCTOR SQUISHED HIS PATIENT ON GETTING ANGRY, RIOTS THROUGHOUT PAKISTAN FOR CHIEF JUSTICE TO TAKE SUO MOTO ACTION AGAINST THE DOCTOR
Scenario 2: Rangers/Police gives Dr. Bruce Banner a ticket

Police: You were speeding
Bruce: I wasn't speeding officer
Police: I am going to give you a ticket for speeding and then lying to an officer
Bruce: WHAT? I didn't lie
Police: Thats two tickets for lying and one ticket for over speeding
Bruce: Don't make me angry, you wont like me when I am angry
Police: Yeah tell this to the people at Jail , cough him
Bruce starts to transform but before he can start Police man take out his gun and shoot him while he is human

Headlines: Maniac Bruce Banner dead , Heroic policeman gets Sitara-e-Shujaat


4. SUPER MAN

The man of steel who can run faster than the train and can take any sort of bullets what kind of problems will he be facing in Pakistan?

Scenario: Gas Pipe Blast In Balochistan

Tabloids Headline: Superman Perishes , was he stupid or just blonde?

Details: Superman has died after trying to be a hero one too many times, local people stopped Superman from becoming a hero and said that they will fix the pipe themselves but Superman tried to be a Hero and when he reached the place, it turns out that it was a Krypton gas reserve and since he had cleared all population from that area nobody could hear his screams as he died a painful death


5. BEN 10

The kid who has become a sensation among the kids these days who gets a watch like device called "Omnitrix" which can transform him into ten different aliens, what if he was in Pakistan

Scenario: Advertisement

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BOYS AND GIRLS
CHILDREN AND ELDER
PEOPLE OF ALL AGES ARE INVITED
TO LOOK AT THE EIGHTH WONDER OF THE WORLD
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DON'T BELIEVE US
BELIEVE WHAT YOU SEE

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LUCKY IRANI CIRCUS



Well Thats It From Me This Time
I Hope I Could Keep The Standards :P

Don't Forget To Like The Page

Till Next Time
X Y'All

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Classic Love Stories: The 2011 Versions

HEYYYYYYYYY

WHAT? NO? Hide your women and children , yes I am Backkkkkkkkkk. Its been ages since I wrote a blog and it was all because of my Mechanical Engineering well am almost half of that now and free these days so m back.

Now onto the topic, we know there have been many love pairs all over the world and all over in history from Romeo & Juliet in stories of Shakespeare to Heer Ranjha in our punjab of Pakistan. Since I have started blogging I have started to look at things with a different eye and that is exactly what happened in this case and I thought what if these love stories and these pairs came to the present day how will these stories reoccur. Lets begin
1. SASSI PUNNUN
Original Version: Sassi was the daughter of a washer man and Punnun was the prince of Makran. When he heard about the beauty of Sassi he came looking for her and fell in love with her. Sassi also loved her so to get her hand in marriage Punnun dressed as a washer man went to her house but her father gave him a challenge to wash clothes since he didn't knew how to he torn the clothes but Punnun gave his father money to get Sassi's hand in marriage. Punnun's brothers were against this marriage so they intoxicated him with many drinks and took him back on a camel's back to Makran but when Sassi knew about this she ran behind Punnun calling for him but she didn't found and died during a sand storm. When Punnun woke up next day he went back looking for her and also died during a sand storm.
2011 Version: A girl named Sass is the daughter of a professor at college, a boy named Paul goes to this girl's home one night and tells her that he loves her and asks her hand in marriage from her dad and acts as an assistant professor. His dad being a professor asks him stuff about study but he fails but then he tells her dad that "I am filthy rich" and the dad agrees for their marriage. When Paul tells his friends about this they are not happy and they think of intoxicating him out of this idea but when they try to do it they get to know that Paul is already 'high' and was doing all this because he was 'high'. Next day when he wakes up, he tells Sass the reality which breaks her heart and she goes off to a metal band concert with her friends to take her anger out where she meets Raja who is the lead guitarist of that band and who is also tired of his girlfriend Hira (explained below) and gets in a relationship with him.
2: SOHNI MAHIWAAL
Original Version: Maahiwal was a poet and Sohni was a potter's daughter. Maahiwal fell in love with Sohni and started writing poetry over her which created riots and Sohni was married to another man. Maahiwal became a loner and started living across the river where Sohni's new house was. Both of them used to meet at night when Maahiwal used to swim across the river to meet her and bring a fish with him to roast. One day he didn't catch a fish so he cut a part of his thigh when Sohni saw this she cried. From next day Sohni used her baked pots to swim to Maahiwal as he can't swim because of the injury. One day Sohni's relative replaces her baked pot with an unbaked pot when she catches Sohni's act. When Sohni goes to swim with that unbaked pot she drowns looking this Maahiwal also jumps and drowns with her.
2011 Version: A girl named Sonny is sent a Facebook request by a guy named Michael. She accepts it after looking at his display pictures. As time proceeds on both get interested in each other but they cant meet as they live in different countries so they start talking on Skype everyday. One day Sonny's relative looks at her talking to her boyfriend so she hacks Sonny's account and says bad stuff to Michael with it. Michael gets infuriated at this and he also hacks Sonny's account and sends love messages to different people with it including her uncles. After investigations Sonny sues Michael and her relative for cyber crime and they are sent to prison as Sonny lives her normal life.
3: ROMEO JULIET
Original Version: The classic Shakespeare story is what everybody know. Romeo falls in love with Juliet and Juliet's father hides him and puts her to sleep when Romeo finds her he thinks she is dead so he drinks poison and dies but Juliet wasn't dead and when she wakes up and sees that Romeo is dead she stabs herself with Romeo's dagger and dies
2011 Version: Romeo and Juliet meet in a party and become friends and soon their friendship turns into a relationship, when Juliet's dad gets to know about this he grounds Juliet in her aunt's house with no internet, television or mobile. Romeo goes on a search and when he finds her he contacts all media channels that a father has locked his daughter in a room. All media channels circle that aunt's house trying to ask for justice. People start breaking cars and buildings in protest to get Juliet out of her room. Romeo is invited to different talk shows with politicians who promise him justice but after sometime the media and politicians forget what happened and as time passes Juliet goes insane inside the room and Romeo gets in a relationship with a girl he met at the talk show.
4: MIRZA SAHIBAA
Original Version: Mirza and Sahibaa were playmates from childhood, they had grown up together and with time they fell in love but their families didn't wanted them to get married so they arranged Sahibaa's marriage to another man. Mirza got infuriated and climbed upon his trusty horse, he went to Sahibaa's marriage and took her from there. Sahibaa's brothers followed them and caught up with them, Mirza fought bravely but they were too many and one blow of a sword's strike killed him and on this Sahibaa took the same sword and killed herself
2011 Version: A guy named Mirza and a girl named Natasha (Sahibaa not so 2011) are friends in university and quickly their friendship turns into a relationship. When after graduation they tell their parents, Natasha's parents disagree as Mirza's GPA was under 3 and he won't be able to find a good job so they decide to get Natasha married to a 3.72 CGPA nerd but when Mirza hears about this he gets on his trusty motorcycle to get Natasha but then he sees that his CNG tank is empty and CNG stations are closed since its a Saturday and since Natasha's house is very far away he just texts her "Happy Marriage, hope you have a very happy marriage life" and goes home and plays FIFA 11 on X-Box 360. :P
5: HEER RANJHAA
Original Version: Ranjha was his father's favorite son and after his father's death on the bad treatment of his brothers he left home and came to Heer's village. When Heer saw Ranjha playing his flute she fell in love with him and asked him to look after his father's cattle. Their love increased but one day Heer's uncle caught them and when they asked for marriage Ranjha was refused. He left the village and became a jogi after sometime when he came back he was allowed marriage with Heer. On the day of the marriage the same uncle gave Heer poisoned sweets and when Ranjha knew about it he also ate the same sweet and died.
2011 Version: A guy named Raja interested in music leaves his home with his trusty Gibson guitar and goes to Islamabad there one day he is playing his guitar outside an academy where Hira hears him while playing "Aadat" She falls in love with the music and asks him to play more everyday after academy Hira would listen to Raja's guitaring one day she asked Raja to play a gigg at her school and he does that and gets very good response and they both fall in a relationship and also update their relationship status on facebook. Raja creates his very own band and in time becomes a super star and gets famous. One day he updates his relationship status on facebook "Raja is in a relation with Saas" who he meets on one of his concerts (explained above) which gets Hira infuriated and she comments bad on it. They remove each other from facebook and breakup
6: LAYLA MAJNUN
Original Version: Layla and Majnun fell in love, since Majnun was a poet he wrote stuff on her but then Layla's parents got her married to someone else this disheartened Majnun and he became a loner and he roamed around areas writing his poetry in stones and sand until Layla got sick and died and days later Majnun was also found dead with an unknown female grave with a verse written about Layla
2011 Version: Majeed gets Layla's number from somewhere when he contacts her they become friends one day Majeed this he is in love and he proposes to Layla who in turn asks for a Jazz '100' mobile card to be in relationship Majeed gets angry and he leaves her and stops talking to girls while Layla finds another guy :P
THATS IT FOR THIS TIME
TILL NEXT TIME
X Y'ALL