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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Top 10 MOST HATED LIST


Heyyyyyyyyyy

M back again with another one of my shenanigans (Yes I had to look up the spelling for this word on Google) :P . This time I bring to you

Dun
Dun
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Top 10 MOST HATED PEOPLE Of Mine

Before I start this I have some things to tell

1. This list DOES NOT include any real life person I have met because that would get a little too personal
2. This list ONLY includes "THINGS" that people call "Celebrities & Groups" in English
3. I am fully responsible for this list and AL QAEDA is NOT behind me :P
4. I LOVE PAKISTAN ( Just for the record )

Now lets start with the list and here we go



10: Himesh Reshamiya


This position had quiet a tough fight and I had saved it for all those who are an insult to music with Lady Gaga, Jonas Brothers & Jay Sean fighting for the spot but this man was just tooooo powerful to take it from them. Let me introduce to you the nasal singer Himesh reshamiya. He did one song which was "Ashiq Banaya Aap Nay" and I DONT KNOW HOW he got sooooo succesful. He sings from his nose, his lyrics are stupid, half of his song have the same words going over and over and over again and his music just don't get me started on that failed 1350's music. Himesh please I BEG YOU leave singing and wait wait wait he has now started acting too?? :-S ......... Yes folks its true judgement day is getting near as we speak.

9. Ali Saleem


Man? Begum Nawazish Ali? Or Just Plain ___________ ........ I dnt knw but he/she/it ends up on this list because the 'thing' is just trying to protest against what ALLAH made him/her/it. He/she/it openly wears a semi women dress not on just his/her/its show but everywhere he/she/it goes. He/she/it also took this avatar to India when he/she/it went to participate in that STUPID show called Big Boss....... A TOTAL DISGRACE TO PAKISTAN

8. Jose Mourinho & Arsene Wenger



If looked Individually I don't hate them to the extent that they would end up on this list but a if combined a creature such as 'Jose Wenger' or 'Arsene Mourinho' is surely a thing that I WOULD HATE A LOT. Arsene Wenger on one hand who still can't bear the 4-1 whupping that Barca gave to them LAST YEAR and keeping it on his ego and doing EVERYTHING anti-barca at the moment including not allowing Cesc Fabregas to follow his dream and come to Barcelona.

Then on the other hand there is Jose Mourinho the manager who HATES Barcelona through & through. Although it was Barcelona that brought him up but right now the major goal of his life is to somehow take Barcelona to second position. He did that very well with Inter by eliminating Barcelona in the semi finals and I HATE HIM for that but in the recent El Clasico , welllll :P :P to read that go to " http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2010/11/hi-five-to-humiliation-for-madrid.html " to read the full story. All I would like to say to mourinho is "HI FIVE" :P HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

PEP GUARDIOLA RULES

7. MATHIRA

Alright since this is a family blog I won't be posting ANY pics of mathira because there is NO picture of her thats DECENT. Not even a single one and she is just absolutely unbelievable and she is so proud of doing this and thinks that what shex doing is perfect and those who are stopping are wrong and hosts like the one on Samaa and ARY Digital are encouraging her on wearing shorter the clothes and call her that shex bold to take steps like these. Ufffffffffffffff

6. Robert Pattinson



The jiggly vampire :P ......... HOW CAN I NOT include this man or thing in this list. Since the twilight series has been released he has been a pain to our ears from GIRLS & Other kind of men from all over the world. Robert pattinson a.k.a Edward Cullen ............ AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH....... LADIES I WILL SAY IT TODAY HE IS NOT A MAN ND THATX IT



5. BCCI



By BCCI what I indirectly mean to say is INDIAN CRICKET .......... Complete. A-Z of it. They think they are such good at it while they certainly aren't. Pakistan has shown to them again and again that they suck. Always going against Pakistani cricket like they think they are the boss. Not bidding for the KINGS OF T20 in IPL that was just hillarious and it haunted them soooooo bad. Then having players like Srinath, Ashish Nehra and Virender sehwag whose face shows their absolute "KAMEENAPAN". The board is always after cricket board and they are SOLELY responsible for Pakistan being stripped from the World Cup hosts. I HATE INDIAN CRICKET

4. JUSTIN BEIBER

The pic says it all, the most funniest pic among the top 10. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. Justin Beiber thinks he is a singer? WHATTA JOKE. He is an insult to music I could've put him into the number 10 spot which was reserved for music insults like Lady Gaga, Jonas brothers and Jay Sean but this guy is another level of insult. I mean its his age to learn how to tie his shoe laces and climb on swings and eat lollipops BUT HEX ACTUALLY RUINING IT FOR EVERYBODY. I mean who calls "Like baby oooooohhhhhh oooooohhhhh" MUSIC?? UNBELIEVABLE. Plus this isn't the only list he has added himself to but he has also hit that MOST SEARCHED WOMEN ON GOOGLE list and has happily made it to the number 7 Position. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. DO I NEED TO SAY MORE?


3. VEENA MALIK

ALRIGHT, TO HELL WITH A FAMILY BLOG, ALL KIDS PLEASE CLOSE YOUR EYES AND SKIP TO THE NEXT CATEGORY AND ONLY THOSE PROCEED WHO AGREE TO THIS LINE "VEENA MALIK IS A FEMALE DOG"

ALRIGHT FOR THOSE WHO HAVE PROCEEDED LETS CONTINUE WHO THE HELL DOES SHE THINK SHE IS? UNBELIEVABLE. SHE DRINKS BEER, SHE WEARS SHORT CLOTHES, SHE INSULTS PAKISTANI FAST BOWLER ASIF, SHE SAYS SHE WANTS TO BE INDIA'S DAUGHTER IN LAW, SHE CONFESSES HER LOVE WITH AN INDIAN GUY, SHE DOES ABSOLUTE VULGAR STUFF ON A SHOW AND THEN SHE HAS THE NERVE TO DEFEND HERSELF? TO TOP IT ALL SHE HAS COME BACK TO PAKISTAN AND WILL DEFEND HER SELF IN A PRESS CONFERENCE? PLEASEEEEEEEEE SOMEBODY ANYBODY SHOOT HER WITH A BLOODY BAZOOKA. BLOW HER APART, SHEX A DISGRACE TO OUR NATION. WHO CAN GO THAT LOW TO GET SOME MONEY? ABSOLUTELY DISGRACEFUL AND EMBARRASSING AND SHAMEFUL.......... I HATE YOU VEENA, I HATE YOUR BLOODY GUTS, I WILL KILL YOU....... PLEASE SHARE & RETWEET THIS BLOG SO MUCH SO THAT SHE GETS TO READ IT. I WILL KILL HER IN A LIVE SHOW IF I GET THE CHANCE, I WILL BURN HER ALIVE AND THEN LAUGH AND SAY "BURN VEENA BURNNNNNNN".... I AM STILL BEING VERY DECENT EVEN MY MOM HAS SAID LOTS BOUT HER THAT SHE NEVER SPEAKS ON SUCH TOPICS


2. CRISTIANO RONALDO A.K.A SHITTIANO RO-NAA-LAADO


Well he comes on second for a reason but first for those people who like to compare Messi with this guy. Just one comment from Sevilla's president and then I will move forward "Its blasphemy to compare 'Messi' A great among the greats to Ronaldo JUST A good player"

Now people have asked me again and again why do I hate Ronaldo so much, he scores goals all the damn time, his free kicks are just unbelievable but still u hate him, why? Today let me answer in just one line
Ans: BECAUSE I LOVE FOOTBALL

Ronaldo is a good player, no doubt he has scored unbelievable amount of goals and how he scores them is just breathtaking. His skills of dribbling are just paramount (Dont know if thats a word but wanted to use it :P) BUT Hex a disgrace to football, he dives, cries, cheats , has no respect for other teams, has no respect for other players and has no respect for football. When he starts to loose he starts crying literally like a baby and then he starts to cheat, he dives all the time. He could get Olympic Gold in diving competitions, he pushes and does stupid fouls, he has no respect for anyone including fans, players and even coaches. He pushed Guardiola during the latest El Clasico when Barca were whupping Madrid, WHO THE HELL DOES HE THINK HE IS? People would be surprise to know that I used to be a ronaldo fan. I thought that his name is ronaldo too just like the Brazil one and he will be just like him and now I say he is a disgrace to the name Ronaldo. That is exactly why I call him SHITTIANO RO-NAA-LAADO --> (Don't Cry Poor Baby)

1. PAKISTANI POLITICIANS


The number 1 spot belongs to NOT 1, NOT 2, NOT 3 but a whole bunch of people known as Pakistan's politicians. These people have ruined the country, they fight above the line just to show us but below the line they are all together looting our nation together and taking profits in anything they can get. Poor is getting poorer and rich are getting richer. Poor have no gas, electricity, water and even basic necessities like food have taxes on them but their horses have a whole doctor team and get treated like KINGS. DISGRACEFUL, SHAMEFUL............ COME ON THE YOUTH OF PAKISTAN LETS GET UP........... LETS DO THIS........... LETS DESTROY THEM AND GET THEM DOWN ON THEIR KNEES AND SAVE OUR COUNTRY

WELL THATS THE END
ENDING WITH PICS AND SUBTITLES OF THE PEOPLE ABOVE


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TILL NEXT TIME
X Y'ALL

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AHEM AHEM MOURINHOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Flirts : The Stereotypes

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy

First things first, m FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Second thing: Congratulations to Lionel Messi for becoming Ballon D'or second straight year, I think Xavi deserved it but Xavi & Iniesta are already legends. Let Messi become one for now. So gooooooo the magical trio for the catalans :)

Third Thing: M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Alright now guess whose back? Yeah I know Shawn Michaels returned in WWE but guess again
Yeah I knw Kaka is back from injury in Real Madrid but alright one more guess
NO NO NO M not talking about the return of Beyblade series on cartoon network I was talking about me & my blogs but guess nobody missed them? eh?

Aaaahhh who cares? M still gonna write blogs and you will read em like you always have, you got no choice........ muwahahahahahahahaha

Anywayyyyyyyy...... I was thinking and thinking and thought of many blog topics but then which one to write 1st? Then I thought of this topic and here we go

Flirts.......... Aaaaaahhhh flirts one of the fastly increasing populations of the world. Everyday we see new kind of flirts coming in trying their stuff, while some fail at what they do but the others oh well the others are the ones who don't have to roam around alone.

First lets see what flirting is?

Ans: Flirting is a 1991 Australian coming of age film about a romance between two teenagers starring Noah Taylor & Nicole kidman

Oh wait thats not the definition........... darn u Google....... Lets try again to see what is flirting?

Ans: Flirting is non-physical romantic communication between two people to negotiate mutual attraction through body language and verbal tactics. It is an initiation ritual of human mating and consists of a playful sequence of reveals and challenges that serve to communicate, test, and amplify attraction. Revealing attraction is accomplished primarily through specific modes of body language that indicate contact readiness (hair flicking, eye contact, brief touching, open stances, proximity etc.) and vocal tone (pace, volume, intonation). Challenges (teasing, questions, qualifying, feigned disinterest) serve to increase tension, test intention and congruity.

Alright m pretty much sure that half of that went over your head :P

That is EXACTLY WHY PLEASE use Wikipedia ONLY when YOU CAN :P

So now let me define in simple plain english what is flirting

Ans: It is the ritual when a boy/girl (YES GIRLS FLIRT THERE I SAID IT) come and talk to the other gender in an odd manner trying to impress them with that style is called flirting

Now lets consider the types

1. Cheap Flirts (90% Boys & 10% Girls)
"Is it hot in here or is it just you" well maybe take a look at your dialogue and maybe you might know why are you feeling that way? Oh come onnnnn ........ Seriously you think these work? Well it deserves a slap + heel combo to every cheap flirt out there. These are the ones who have to flirt with EVERY one out there. My university has them and two of them even got their pictures on the new campus advertisement, no wonder :P. They are not just a bad name to the ancient name of flirting but give a bad name to generally that gender as well mostly boys.


2. Amateur Flirts (75% Boys & 25% Girls)

"At last I finally found the perfect girl" ........ Yea I know all you amateur flirts out there waiting for your turn and to tell you the fact you people are the biggest & largest amount of flirts in this category. They are fine but the problem with them is that they don't know when to say what? Their timing is a complete disaster and they can blurt out the most stupidest thing to the most awesomest thing but majorly at the wrong time. Amateur flirts are everywhere and we don't need to go look finding for one just say in your class "OH DAMN" and the ones who look around searching for a girl, VALLA.


3. Nerdy Flirts (30% Boys & 70% Girls)

"Am very good at history so I must be good at dates" Yeah when someone speaks that line he/she MUST have a CGPA above 3.4 Plus ATLEAST. Since many boys are not capable to pull the feat of a 3.4 GPA so its mainly the girls who fall in this category. Starting from notes and rising above is their general method but the problem is that they are only successful if the other one is of their kind too. A nerd can only be good around a nerd otherwise they are not even considered humans, some alien hybrid specie that came down to earth to ruin our grades :P


4. Cool Flirts (65% Boys & 35% Girls)

"Hey flattery will get you everywhere so keep talking" Yea thatx flirting a very diffrent kind of it though. Cool flirts just stay cool and let it be with, they don't care what happens and if they loose one girl/guy for it. They will remain cool and let the others drop for them. To be a cool flirt you need some basic necessities
1. LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF MONEY
The rest comes with the 1st neccesity, below I have given a pic of a cool flirt but am seriously not sure if "IT" is a guy , girl OR? :P




5. Professional Flirts (50% Boys & 50% Girls)

"OMG LOOK AT THAT BOY/GIRL, HE/SHE IS AN ANGEL, HE/SHE IS SOOOOOO NICE" .......... Let me break it down to you people there are too kind of nice people

1. Actually nice people
2. Professional flirts

Both have almost the same kind of reputation in a society but BOY do they have the different methods to achieve it. One simple example winning the player of the year award in FIFA :P
1. Lionel Messi (Actually Nice People)
2. Shittiano Ronaldo (The other kind)

These are the MOST Rarest kind and its very hard to find "NICE" people anyway and among these nice people then these come. Sheesh its a hard world to live in. Well no piece of advice because these people are very lethal and they are at the best at what they do so you can't resist. They are called the Pros for a certain reason and everybody should respect that.


Well thats it from my side for this time
I know I have lost my touch a little but will be back with more soon

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Till Next Time (Keep waiting for an upcoming stunner)
X Y'All