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Saturday, November 5, 2011

Mysteries Revealed 2


Heyyyyyy Alllllllllllllllll

M Backkkkkkkkkk ........... Yes some people don't like me saying "M BACK" in my every blog but I deserve to write in this one because I am writing after a WHOLE 4 WEEKS so I am writing this.

Well had exams....... DON'T ASK

Don't Forget To Like The Page

Was out of topics to write on and never had a second part to a blog before so I thought.

So After Mysteries Revealed Part 1 : http://sohaibx.blogspot.com/2011/09/mysteries-revealed.html

I Give to you 10 more mysteries in Mysteries Revealed Part 2:

1. Justin beiber? A Really Bad Singing Girl Or A Good Looking Midget?



Now this mystery has been circling in my mind from the first time my ears had to go through the torture that was "BABY BABY BABY OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Why is a girl trying to hit on another girl? Oh wait no its just a good looking midget trying to set his life, no wait its a girl, no a midget...... AAAHHHHH MY EARSSSSSSSSSSS *jumps and unplugs the television*. I could've just switched the channel with the remote I had in my hand but this is what Justin's music does to you. So am giving a picture? Who can tell me? Bad singing girl or Good looking Midget?

2. Is Twilight's Edward Cullen A Vampire?




I had never read the books and had only heard about a "Vampire" named Edward Cullen and it was all good. I was also writing a Vampire novel in those times and thought of him as competition so started working hard on my novel and then came the movie. I never wanted to read the book so I "Downloaded" the movie and watched it. By the end of that movie I was sure that what Stephanie Mayer meant by the scene when Edward tells Bella that he is a vampire was this

Bella: You are impossibly fast and strong, your skin is pale and ice cold, your eyes change color and sometimes you speak like you are from a different time, how old are you
Edward: 17
Bella: How long have you been 17?
Edward: A while
Bella: I know what you are
Edward: Then say it out loud
Bella: You are a vampire
Edward: Are you afraid?
Bella: *Turns around* NO

Now read this complete conversation and just replace the word "A Vampire" with "High on cocaine". See now it completely makes sense doesn't it? So NO PEOPLE Edward Cullen is NOT A VAMPIRE
Vampire's DO NOT SPARKLE & JIGGLE, he is more of a Pokemon than a vampire, remember Jigglypuff??

3. wHy d0 PpL Wr1t3 L1k3 d1s?




It took me five minutes to write the above line, MAN it was annoying. I still to this date can't understand how and why people write like this? I mean an "e" is an "e" not 3 , "i" is "i" not 1, "o" is "o" not 0 and the continuous alternations between small and capital letters. Sheesh if you would give this much hard work in your studies then you can achieve greater wonders.

4. Why Do Men Wear Pink?




Always has been a mystery and always will be, WHY? WHY? WHY? When did Blue, Green, Maroon, Black, Grey, Brown and all other dark colors not be enough for you people? Why did you have to chose pink, purple, shocking pink, golden and other sparkling colors? For all those Robert Pattinson, Justin Beiber and Cristiano Ronaldo inspired men a.k.a women. Become a man. NOT A WOOOO-MAN

5. How Is An Indian Film Hero A Professional Fighter, Poet, Singer, Dancer All At The Same Time?



Scene 1:
The hero composes and writes a complete song and sings it amazingly (if not sung by Hamesha Reshamiya) with great dance to impress heroin

Scene 209:
He composes and writes a duet song with the heroin and then sings it greatly (if not sung by Hamesha Reshamiya) and dances with her as well

Scene 35789:
Villain comes in and does something and hero goes out to beat him and his thugs and in doing so he becomes an invincible super hero and does all this


I mean which men in the world are capable of doing all this together? I have never understood Indian movies ever and I can't as well. Whenever there is a song in an Indian movie then where is the music coming from? Why do they never show the band playing it? If the hero and heroin are singing a song at a very beautiful valley then did they decide to do it there? How did they completed the setup of background music? and if their is a song in a party then how does everyone in that party know the complete dance steps of that song and dance behind the hero and heroin while that song has never been sung or heard before?? AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH TOOOOOO MUCH CONFUSION


6. Why Don't Women Rule The World?

If they did then the world would be something like this







NUFF SAID


7. Why Do People Update Facebook Status On Their Every Move? 




" _____________ is going lunching"
" _____________ just got back from university, going to sleep a while then come back"
" _____________ just got back from the bathroom"
" _____________ phew ate, i was hungry now eating fruits"

Tired of these status updates?? Man I don't know why some people feel the need to tell everything on their facebook, from their eating, to sleeping, to eating again to trashing away what they ate. It gets HELL LOTTA annoying and then all you need to do is click in the upper right corner of that status and click Hide All by _____________ :P :P



8. Why Do People Like The Movie "Dabanng"?




The final thanks to the Niazi bus service and I HATE THEM FOR THIS. I had to see this movie twice and once this movie ended the conductor would play its video songs over and over and over again. AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Terrible movie, terrible acting, terrible action, terrible dialogues, terrible songs, terrible story and terrible just pure torture. I still don't know how this movie got such a great response and won sooooo many awards beating "3 Idiots" this just shows the amount of illiteracy in Pakistan and Indian people. A literate person will never watch this movie and if you liked this movie and call yourself literate. My friend its about time you reconsider

Enough for funny mysteries , time for 2 serious topics

9. Why People Buy Mickey Mouse/ Ghauri Missile & Pictures Printed Pakistani Flags?


THIS IS THE FLAG OF PAKISTAN


NOT THIS!!!!!!!!!!!

I have seen people "molest" yes I am using the word "molest" the Pakistani flag that is the crescent and the star in the green and white with pictures of the "Ghauri Missiile" , "Quaid-e-Azam" , "Allama Iqbal" and the WORST "MICKEY MOUSE" I mean what the hell does Mickey mouse has to do with Pakistan? Did Walt  Disney created Pakistan? For GOD's sakes people, drawing anything over a flag of a nation is complete INSULT of that flag and is completely against the respect of that flag. I request all people to NEVER buy these kinds of flags as they never show love for Pakistan

10. Why Do People Celebrate On 9th & 10th Of Muharram? 

I always wanted to talk on this topic and today I will. I may be from Fiqah-e-Jaffriya but that doesn't mean that only Fiqah-e-Jaffriya people mourn the martyrdom of Hazrat Imam Hussain (A.S), his family and followers who laid their lives and everything they had to save Islam. No all other Fiqahs also mourn this sad occasion but I have seen people around Pakistan who use these 2 days (9th and 10th Muharram) as they are as holidays to enjoy and party. People take their families to Muree to enjoy, people flying kites everywhere, gardens filled with people playing and joking. Really?? I really don't understand why Muslims of all the religions in the world do it? Even non muslims respect Hazrat Imam Hussain (A.S) but our own Muslims behaving as such for the family of Holy Prophet (S.A.W) ??

SHAMEFUL SHAMEFUL


Well That's It For This Time
Parts 2 & 3 dedicated to a Notoriously Zesty (NZ) friend :P :P

Stay Safe
EID MUBARAK TO YOU ALL


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X Y'All

3 comments:

  1. Part 5, As the hero smacked the jeep captain in the head and instead of falling down he flies upwards :P :P :P
    proving the Newton's 3rd law wrong.
    .
    .
    .
    Part 10 is really shameful I agree with u on that.

    ReplyDelete